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I would display this fact prominently upon my shidokh resume and if it ever comes up in conversation, i tell everyone about it.
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It's something that excites me and clearly the Gamaris has beautiful words about it.
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Yet some people seem to misunderstand the topic.
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My holy parents are Balachuva, unbelievable.
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They have come close to the fold of Judaism I swear, before I was even born, more than 30 years now where probably my father knows more Torah than your father and my mother has more Yerishami than your mother.
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I'm just trash talking because I'm big fans of my parents.
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They're my role models.
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The Gamaris says bimokim shabalachuva oimdem einsadikim gemurim yechayim la'amod.
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Balachuva have special treatment, certain proximity, a closeness with the Almighty.
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And in a recent conversation with my father we were schmoozing back and forth and I asked him you know some of your old friends, do they ever look back at some of their decisions, those that have not become Balachuva?
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Do they ever think about what life perhaps would have looked like if they stayed friendly with my parents and became Balachuva as well?
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And my father said something shocking.
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He said you know, truthfully, it's not really the normal way.
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People don't really think about their actions.
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Decide if this is right or if this is wrong, did I make a bad decision there?
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And it kind of struck us that moment That the difference between chuva and na'chuva is exactly what Billum said at least how Gamara expounds Billum's words Al-kein yoymuha, moishlim bo'u lecheshbon.
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Somebody who was moishel be'yitram, somebody who has taken the reins on their life, is someone who was they called a moishel be'yitram.
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That's why it's for one reason because they made an accounting, a reckoning of their actions.
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A'chejbon ha-nafesh.
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And if you're to ask the Ramchal what is the best place to start in your spiritual journey, he will tell you.
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In Masih As-Yashar, chapter 3, k'lal hadavar, the general rule is ye yeh'odam ma'ayin al-maisav kula mu'vakayachal kodh rechav, thinking and making an accounting of your actions.
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Shalolahaniach la'atsmo hergol roh midarah, just living haphazardly, you may have God forbid sins or things that you don't want in your life, but you've never thought about them, so you've never discovered them, so you've never taken the leap to rid yourself of them.
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Vehenein irroyetso yerech la'odam.
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A person need sheyem edaktik.
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Ve'shaikil d'rochav dovaryan be'yayin ma'ayin, set times every day for khejbon ha-nafesh, k'socharem agedayim.
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Like diamond jewelers that balance their checkbooks, weigh their diamonds, they make a khejbon ha-nafesh.
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We know that it's a serious practice.
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It's something that we should do a very lauded thing to make a khejbon ha-nafesh.
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But it came to my attention through the conversation with my saintly parents that the difference between Chuvah, oilamhabah, vip seats of the Bessam Migdash and a life full of thistles and thorns a life very far from that is khejbon ha-nafesh.
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Thinking about our lives meaning and what we can do to get better.
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Take 30 seconds out of your day, out of your night time to make a khejbon ha-nafesh and accounting of your actions.